Whether consciously or unconsciously, we are constantly evaluating the people we meet to see if they are trustworthy.
When we’re on a first date, meet a new coworker or deal with a salesperson, our minds are scanning their words, body language, and behavior for any red flags.
Being able to accurately assess a person’s trustworthiness can be a big benefit to your professional life, but in intimate relationships, it can mean the difference between life or death.
A Reddit user with a suspicious name asked the online forum “What small thing makes you automatically distrust someone?” and people revealed how they root out the shady people in their lives.
Here are 11 of the best responses.
1. “When they flat out ignore what you say to talk about themselves. I don’t trust you, i know you’re only there for your own benefit and fuck anyone else around you.” — PotShotShooter
2. “If someone happily tells you they’ve cheated on someone before. One of the biggest red flags ever.” — lszommer1
3. “When they give non-apologies after doing something wrong, like ‘I’m sorry to see you feel that way’ instead of ‘I’m sorry for what I did.’ Or, ‘That’s just the way I am,’ or ‘Why do you care so much?’ or ‘It’s not a big deal.'” — ghost0427
4. “When someone borrows something and never attempts to return or mention it until you bring it up.” — supnottoomuch
5. “When they put a lot of energy into manipulating people instead of just living their lives.” — blinkysmurf
6. ‘”They told me not to tell anyone but…’ Never will trust someone like that. If they tell me other people’s secrets they’ll no doubt tell other people mine.” — YikesImBack
7. “Repeatedly not following through…small things too. ‘Hey, I’ll talk to you later this afternoon.’ Nothing. ‘I listened to this great song, I’ll send it to you.’ Nothing. I just feel like those little moments are foreshadowing bigger things / disappointments to come.” — TristramBambi
8. “It’s said so often I’m not worried about giving it away. Mistreating service people, children, less intelligent people and animals.” — -a-y
9. “When their opinions on the same topics change depending on who they are with.” — OutBack10
10. “When I catch them lying about something very small with no consequences if they were to tell the truth.” — incomplewor
11. “When they are SUPER nice to me, compliment the hell out of me and want to be best friends right away. Immediately makes me suspicious and I put my guard up. I assume they have ulterior motives and are trying to establish a false rapport with me in order to throw me off their scent.” — Spookyredd